Skip to main content

Letters to Sara - Life as a Gift

I was reading from Tony Robbins this morning. His comment was to look at life as a gift. I think that is a beautiful way to view our existence. It makes one feel as if we are chosen. As if we are special. But that really doesn't describe how we get life. Our lives come to us more like Branches sprouting from the trunk of a tree. We depend on everyone who has come before us because we are made of the combining of genetic information created by countless pairings back to the dawn of existence. The fact that we have made it so far is remarkable. Bill Bryson in his book about the history of everything said we should feel fortunate that all our ancestors were attractive enough to find mates and lucky enough to live sufficiently long to have children. That is an impressive string. Every ancestor before us was attractive and healthy enough to find a mate and have kids so that we are where we are. When we are looking at our family tree as you did in that class, we can only go back so many generations. Your cousin Joe said part of our shared family tree goes back to the Merovingian kings of France and to Charlemagne. He said that in a different fate, we would be living in Buckingham Palace in England because we are directly related to Henry the something??? Like it matters anyway. Mostly we don't pay attention to those distant relations. We look to parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents. Why? Probably because the farther back we look, the less relation we bear to those ancestors. Think of it. I contributed 1/2 your genetic makeup (approximately). Your grandparents a fourth. Great-grandparents 1/8th and so forth. By the time we get back to those so long ago, we might be more related to the local inhabitants of our area than our direct ancestors. Apparently our looks aren't the only things passed on by heredity. Perhaps our behavior and personality come through as well. Take any small animal for instance. They have much of their behavior hard wired in so they know what to do upon birth. A human baby knows how to nurse immediately. There are differences in how these things are expressed. These differences come from the contributions of each family. If we are observant, we can see ourselves in our families. It is these similarities that make up a part of the family bond. I think I sought out a partner whose family was like my own in many ways. But when I look at my own family, I can see many parts of myself. I can see parts of the prior generation in the next. I think this is the "gift". It is a window into our own souls. We can see parts of ourselves clearly in their lives. It can helps us know who we are. It gives us a guide for the future. There were things about my Dad that I didn't like. But there were many things that I did. But like or dislike, I am like him. I am my Father's son. And that has helped me at times to understand myself. Having characteristics like both my Mother and Father has not been easy to keep reconciled within my own mind. They have given me examples of courage, perseverance, fortitude, and strength that I hope if the need arises some day, I can model as well. So my being alive is not a gift from them. It is a result. But the people they were and how that shapes me, that is the gift.

Popular posts from this blog

Maxwell Atticus Simon

Welcome to planet Earth. The little fellow weighed in at 8lbs 2 oz and 20 inches. I don't think he appreciates the attention he was getting at the moment. This was apparently during his weighing in and bath time. This is the time that they stick the heel for some blood work. Poor little fellow. It doesn't get much better for us. The Buddha said, "life is suffering." Ain't it the truth! But there will be some pretty nice moments. Witnessing the miracle of new life is one of the better ones. I am glad to see some males coming to the family. All those years outnumbered by the women of the house have taken a toll. Now maybe we can see some manly influence for a change.

Spock

Spock is my favorite character in all fiction. A character who bridged the gap between two worlds and faced disdain from each. Who strove for excellence and exemplified strength, character, intelligence, and control. His nearly emotionless demeanor was a perfect foil for those who would attempt to intimidate or insult him. It was a style I would endeavor to imitate to thwart those attempting to insult, demean, or scare me in my own young life. I bought this little figure to remind me to guard against letting my defenses down and allowing emotional hurt to strike me. But I doubt my recollection of Spock will work for me again. It was the last gift from my past. Perhaps I will find another reservoir of strength.

There is an African proverb that says "when death finds you, may it find you alive".

On July 31st, I died.... After having several weeks of discomfort in my neck and jawline, I made an appointment to see my PCP to determine what was going on. The consensus seemed to center around a gall bladder problem. But he suggested that we should rule out cardiac. Once I got over to the hospital, I had a wait of 20 minutes or more before I was sent up to my room. Immediately I was taken for a chest x-ray. Once I got back I saw my nurse and the lab tech were there and I lay down to let her get the blood. As I leaned back, I felt a wave of nausea and everything went quiet and dark.  I became aware again after a short period of time, I'm unsure how long. and from there it was a lengthy process to be transported to Grandview where I received a heart catherization and ultimately, bypass grafts. It was literally like hitting the off switch on your computer.