Thursday, September 06, 2007

Another tandem bike...


I found this tandem on Ebay and bought it for Bev and I to do some riding in the woods. It claims to be aluminum and the shipping weight seems to be in line with that. At 37 pounds shipping, it would be as light as my old single Specialized mountain bike single. After a through checkout we will see how it rides. Now I need to do some looking for a suitable spot to get Bev started on a tandem ATB. Not on those terrible ups and downs in the National Forest yet. Just something fun.

Sunday, September 02, 2007

The two kinds of bike rides...


Yesterday, Bev and I rode in the Jim Glassner Century in Montgomery. Our plan was to see how we felt and attempt a full century if possible. Along the way we met a young woman from Auburn who mentioned there were, in her view, two kinds of bike rides. Either a ride for pleasure or a ride of accomplishment. Our ride falls squarely in the second category. At the split for the metric century, we thought we could go the distance but were concerned about the time. So we opted to ride out on the century route then turn off and short the route. Along the way, we got into some rolling hills which really began to put a strain on the ride. Both my legs began to cramp. But we kept on and managed to do a 80.75 mile ride.

That evening, we were both done in. My legs cramped so badly on the drive home, I had to get out and walk them out on the side of the road. It left me very sore. Bev spent the evening resting. She fell asleep on the couch. But this morning we are feeling better. It takes a day or two to recover. I'll be fine by tomorrow. I expect Bev will be ready for a little ride by Tuesday. Then we can look ahead to the All You Can Eat Century in Huntsville.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Stinking, rotten Summer cold...

I picked up the runny nose from Nikki and the boys. Yep! I've got the crummy summertime cold. I feel like crap. I am glad I am working at the hospital while feeling like this. I don't think I could make it at Wal-Mart feeling this bad. I am debating on whether or not to do the ride with Paul tomorrow. It would be a mountain bike kind of day. Perhaps we can just do some trick riding or just go down some dirt roads. After the ride this morning, I almost couldn't get up and get going from the couch. I really just wanted to stay there.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Tomorrow is my birthday...

Bev tells me that the children are coming to the house for lunch because of my birthday. This is a surprise. It may simply be part of those feelings I've had trouble coping with but I haven't felt like my life has meant very much. It has been a point of ironic humor that my nickname is "diddlee". My own diagnosis of my problem calls for me to attempt to be positive, confident, and heroic as I attempt to remedy my emotional state. I have faced a world of disappointment over the past 6 years. It is time to let it go and move forward. Past time. There is wonder left to find in the future. There is no way to know what is waiting ahead. Now is all I have. I have to stop wasting it.

Joe called to wish me well but when he called I was occupied in the bathroom and missed it. Maybe he can call back tomorrow night. He had called the house first and spoken with Bev. I really appreciate the friendship I have with him. Of all the cousins, he is the best guy to spend time with.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Going deep....

I really feel the same feelings from the other day. Like grief. I read over my notes but can't shake the sadness. It has come over me like a fog. I just don't know how to shake it. Maybe I need to get on an antidepressant. Maybe I just need to get away for a while. I think I need to get some serious thinking done.

Talk more freely about you midlife anxieties. Have conversations with those you’re closest to about issues troubling you.
This suggestion might be the hardest for me. I don't have anyone I can talk to about this. I have bent the ears of my friends on family issues till I am sure they wish I'd be quiet.


Saturday, July 28, 2007

Mary Ann Radmacher...

“Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.”


I found this quote and really appreciate the sentiment but I don't understand all the content here. I could draw my own conclusions but leaving the statements open gives more opportunity for meaning.

Friday, July 27, 2007

Mid-life crisis...

I think I have found out what is going on with me lately. I must be having the old fashioned mid-life crisis. I read over some descriptions in Psychology Today and it fit right down to the ground. Funny thing is I am feeling all these things and I didn't know where it was coming from or why. These pointers included some others which included losing weight, exercise and getting checkups. I think I have those covered. Among these others, they are long on what but short on how. But some of them hit close to what my intuition was telling me. Living in the moment is essential. Books and music are therapeutic.
  • Reduce stress and worry. Stress is a major source of trouble for men in midlife. Reduce stress by living life in the present, letting go of control, dealing with negative emotions and learning to prepare for what is expected and unexpected.
  • Embrace a sexuality appropriate to the second half of life. Young men are often focused on a kind of sexuality that is based on immediate attraction to people. In the second half of life, sexuality expands to include more emphasis on friendship, love, intimacy and spirituality.
  • Take on new challenges. To keep a supply of freshness and excitement in your life consider going back to school, writing a book or a song or learning a brand new hobby.
  • Change the scenery occasionally. A change of scenery improves one’s spirit even if only for short periods of time. Attend an out-of-state conference, plan weekends of camping or boating, visit the ocean, hike in the mountains.
  • Rest and leisure are important. A balance of work and relaxation is critical to one’s physical and emotional well-being.
  • Talk more freely about you midlife anxieties. Have conversations with those you’re closest to about issues troubling you. While most men are unwilling to share with their wives or significant other what they really feel, over time, such conversations increase one’s understanding and love for each other. So take a risk and open up!
  • Care for yourself psychologically. Music and books play significant roles in helping you relax, reduce stress or express yourself.

Blessed aloneness

  I t is very common to feel a strong, even urgent, need for solitude and to turn inward after a cardiac arrest . Surviving such a life-alt...